Look at that number. I mean really that is almost unreal to me! I was 205.4 monday morning and I said that I had to lose six pounds by saturday morning. HAD TO. So in some weird mix of fasting, exercising, purging, and eating next to nothing, voilá! 199.4 ONE NINETY NINE POINT FOUR!!!!! God I don't think I've ever been this excited in my life!
I am sorry for the hiatus, but I needed to get my shit together. I love you guys and writing and rambling to you makes me happy, but I was sick of the 200s. I had to find something to force me to do it. So I said I couldn't blog again until I got under 200. You don't know how hard that made me work because I missed you guys so fucking much! But for future reference, if you ever what to hear my rambles 24/7 you can always follow me on twitter. I'm on there EVERYDAY. I am addicted!! So I'm Scarlet_Tbeauty on there!
Also I am a true size 14 now. It's funny, I bought some gloria vanderbilt cargo pants out of a resale shop, size 14, tried em on. Perfect fit! So I bought them. Then my dad randomly bought me 2 pairs of shorts, also size 14. Perfect fucking fits!!!!! I tried on every size 14 in my mom's closet and EVERYTHING was perfect. Holy shit I'm a person again!!!!
Today was weigh-in day for more than just me though. Because I got under 200, my mom and dad had to weigh too. My mom is 171.2, which she was okay with. She's been eating kind of shit lately so she's happy she maintained/ lost 2 lbs. My dad is a whole nother story. Do you know how HARD it was to coax him on that scale?!? He like fucking jammed the logic on the poor thing twice talking about "it's an omen I shouldn't weigh in" I'm thinking "you shit head! If you didn't eat so fucking much all the time you wouldn't be terrified!!" But FINALLY we got him on the scale: 375.2 lbs. So he lost like 1.8 since the last time he weighed with was MONTHS ago. Fun fact though, after we all weighed he realized something. Put together my mom and I only weigh 370.6 lbs. We weigh four fucking pounds LESS than him, put to-fucking-gether!!!!! That messed him up so badly, I hope it give him the kick in the ass he needs!
So far this month I have lost 17.6 lbs which is the most I've ever lost in a month and the month isn't over for another 8 days!!! Whhhhhoooooopppeeeeee!!!!
So now let's talk about my so-called life...it's quite shit right now. I'm working on a research project and they won't fucking pay me. Like this is coming up on week seven of ten and I still have no idea when I am going to get paid! Stupid unprofessional school. Dammit I want my money so badly! Secondly, I have been trying to hang out with my friends Monika and BK for like all summer. And like tuesday I find out these bitches made plans to hang out on friday. Without me. Bitches. Just wait until I come back to school looking ah-mazing. I'm not going to even deal with you backstabbing assholes. Ugh. And then my other friend Matt is trying to hang out with me but weird things keep happening. Like we were supposed to see Inception and everything but he can't do it until after July 30th because he has finals and has to study. Fine. But then he comes back and says his aunt is going today (saturday) and that maybe we can go together! That was sunday. Then yesterday he calls and says he can't for "various reasons" wtf? Various reasons??? I think his wife kate is just spazzy about him hanging out with a girl but come on! I'm SEVENTEEN. Matt is like fucking 32. Trust me, nada is gonna happen. Also apart from the fact that I'm his honorary little sister, we were going with his AUNT, her SON, and my PARENTS. Really? Anyway so that kinda has me pissed off. And then my parents are having their off and on fighting again. But they always do that. I miss my friends and I wish they would start acting like fucking friends and hangout with me. First thing on my agenda when I go back to school with my skinnier body is to get better quality friends. Immediately. Gotta come out my shell this semester and talk to people. Whoever sits next to me is going to be my new bff.
Anyways, I have been altering songs again to be thinspo. Up today is "Billionaire" by Travie McCoy ft. Bruno Mars. Side note, bruno mars is adorable. Just sayin'. So here are the new lyrics to the chorus. If you haven't heard the song go look it up on itunes! It's really good!! :)
I wanna be a skinny girl, so frickin' bad, wear all the clothes I never had
I wanna be on the cover of, Vogue magazine, dressed head to toe in D&G
Everytime I close my eyes, I see the space between my thighs, awesome days, amazing nights, oh I, I swear, you better prep the world for when I'm a skinny girl!
Lol yes I did write all of that and I hear it in my head ALL THE TIME now. It's really catchy! :)
As far as food today...as little as possible. It's saturday so anything could happen, but imma start a fast on monday, and of course you're getting a new post on monday!! Cause I don't think I'm ever going to have a hiatus that long EVER again because I <3 you guys!!!
AnnikaQ (even though I've blocked her from my blog): hahahahahaha that is me laughing in your doubting face. Fasting never averages in a 1-2 lbs a week and the body never gets used to it. Because you just read ED blogs and don't have an ED you just don't understand the mechanics. While 17.6 lbs in a month is unreal in your world it's perfectly okay in the thin neverlands.
Audri: hey welcome to the blog! That's so sweet that means a lot to me!!! <3
Ana Nae: welll, even though I won the race I'm still behind you 100%!!!!!!! You can do it! <3 :)
A.Beautiful.Mess: aw thanks babe, I missed the italian team! Tbh I started watching the world cup because of the guys! Lol, but then I got into it! I can't wait for 2014!!!! :)
BMay: thanks! I've lost 70.6 lbs total from my high weight! I normally try to fast for like 2-3 days because that's when I get the most benefit. My parents are cool with my fasting though they do prefer if I liquid or juice fast because they worry about me getting vitamins and nutrients and such. We don't really believe in supplements so food (or drink) is the only way we think we're actually getting some! :)
Kazehana: omg how sweet!!! I'm gonna go check out that award RIGHT NOW. And thank you for commenting!! ;)
Jo: aww I did it just for you babe! ;)
Jenny: haha I love you babe you always make me smile. Hey it all starts with one day and then you just keep going!!! <3 :)
Okay if you made it to the bottom of this super long post then *hugs*!!!!!!!
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