Monday, April 5, 2010

Growing Pains

O I've made mistakes, and you say it's just growing pains, when I feel ashamed, you tell me it's just growing pains, when I'm crying out for change, you tell me it's just growing pains, and O I've made mistakes, and yes I know it's growing pains
---'Growing Pains' by La Roux
So yeah...that's how I'm feeling rite now. But I haven't done that much bad stuff, it's mostly because I'm a masochist and weigh myself during hell week. NO ONE else does this. I've read at least a zillion blogs that the people say they just don't weigh. But I can't resist. I keep seeing that sky-high number and I feel like crying. And I try to say maybe it's a bad dream and it'll go away. I'm up 5.2 lbs total and it won't fucking go away. I mean I guess it will eventually, but being that high is screwing with my head. I also have a presentation to do in my humanities class tomorrow and I bought this cute top that looked amazing on me on friday...but now idk. I haven't tried it on but I guess it doesn't matter, the gain is mostly in my head!
Omgosh sorry I have been a bit of a downer lately, I am just stressed out and this weight and stuff is killing me. Note to scarlet: don't weigh until SUNDAY!
Okay, I'm happy again. Telling you guys and rationalizing it made me feel a zillion times better.
So this week should be interesting. I'm soooo excited. Apart from my humanities presentation tomorrow and then my fluid mechanics exam on weds, I think the big thing this week will be my physics lab this thursday. I mean, I was lab partners with A last time, and SC the lab before that. So what will be the pair this week??? Will A try to be my partner again this week, even though MF is going to be back from St. Louis? Also, if A does try to be my lab partner, will SC have something to say about it??? Hahaha, I love the potential of this situation. I mean it could be that everything goes back to normal, but on the other hand, it also can go interesting.
Oh I have a question for you guys: okay, I am nervous about putting my pic up yet (when I get to 183 I swear I'll post one, I know, a long time, but not too long hopefully!), but I have two really cute pictures of A and SC. Sooo, if you wanna c them, let me know in the comments of this post and I'll post them on weds, and take them down on friday morning (because they have the right to privacy too!). That way you can see these two boys I am so torn between!! Hahaha.
M-ilie: hahahaha, I hope it's a good sign too! I am just sooo confused when it comes to boys it's ridiculous. When I was young I didn't get the whole "little boys terrorize girls they like" concept. I pretty much just beat the crap outta them, hahaha. Thankfully I've matured hahaha.
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  1. YES! I would love to see pics of them :L And i cant wait to see the pics of you either, its really neat to see what other bloggers look like, and yes it wont be lond before your 183, think thin stay strong x

  2. OMFG Yes we wana see pics of your boys, and when your 183 your guna feel a little better and a little better and better. The more you loss the better your life gets. I know how you feel about the whole wiegh in thing, it's like I wana wiegh every day but if I do I get a stressful yuckyness. It's like my goal was to loss even more but I only lost a little bit but some times I gain and stress causes gain.

  3. Yeah!!! Post them!!! Hey girl, as far as the weighing thing, when you weigh when you know you are not doing good, you just set yourself to feel bad. You can do this... Just try to not weigh til Sunday, and be really good until then, and then when you step on the scale you will feel amazing! And then it will set you in motion for continued success! I have done this before and it really works for me-- its all a mind game, you know?

    Good luck! I'm cheering for you!